The One Where I Feel Discouraged.

Today, I’m just not feeling it. I know I went way overboard this weekend.  I know that no matter how perfect I am for the next three days I will probably have gained weight when I weigh-in on Thursday.  I know I will have to post that here and explain away (for no one’s benefit except my own) why I did this or didn’t do that or gained this much.

I’m annoyed.  And disappointed.  And frustrated.  I know that I can’t expect perfection from myself, and I really haven’t, but the way I ate on Friday, Saturday and Sunday, you would have thought I was trying to put on weight to make the Varsity Football team.  Don’t worry, no scrawny O-lineman here.

So now the challenges are: 1) getting back on the wagon and 2) pinpointing what lead to this undisciplined behavior.

1)  I made myself a delicious Black Bean Burger for lunch and I feel better already.   It was colorful and filling.  I’ve already planned my post-work workout and I am ready to get back in the gym and keep listening to Mockingjay on my iPod.

2)  This is the hard part.  I’m not entirely sure what contributed to my weekend eating mayhem.  I know that part of it was a result of Miss H’s Fantastic Fiasco birthday bash.  There were lots of yummy snacks and the cocktails flowed, which meant that yesterday all I wanted was food, glorious food.  My solution to a hangover usually involves Ramen noodles, copious amounts of Diet Dr. Pepper, and either something spicy or something fried. Hell, sometimes it’s both.  I mean, nothing about a salad screams hangover cure.  That said, I ate 3 bad for me meals yesterday.  Last night, I felt fine.  I wasn’t even hungry really, but I felt like I should eat dinner because it was dinner time and I didn’t want to cook.  I also ate more than I should have on Friday for lunch and dinner and on Saturday for lunch — to coat my stomach for the night’s festivities, natch.  Basically, I was completely out of control.

Clearly, drinking leads to more eating for me.  I don’t drink heavily that often so I don’t think that a bigger lunch on Saturday before the party and/or on Sunday after the party would be that big of a deal, IF I hadn’t eaten like crazy for 3 days straight.  The problem is really that I went completely rogue for 3 solid days.  And now I feel guilty and groddy.

I think part of the problem is that I was getting bored with the food I’ve been eating.  I think it would be beneficial for me to start halving recipes so they make less so I don’t have to eat 4-5 servings of the same meal in a week.  Also, the chili I made last week just wasn’t that good so I know that didn’t help me out.

My other problem is social.  Last week I had several fun outings and I have several more this week. It was really, really fun, but it is also usually detrimental to my food/exercise choices.  My friends are incredibly supportive and encouraging, but when we are out and about I don’t want to order a salad or only have one glass of wine.  For me, food is often a part of making merry and I don’t want to “miss out.”  I know that I need to work on reforming my attitudes toward food, but I also need to remember that this year I promised myself (and all of you) that I would focus on my HEALTH.  And sometimes that means I need to stay home when I feel like my will power just isn’t there for the week.

I plan on coming up with some small goals and rewards to go along with them to post this week.  I think/hope having a few smaller, concrete goals in mind will help me when my resolve is waning.

And a couple of things to end on a more positive note:

1) I made Lighter Buffalo Chicken Dip for the party on Saturday night and it was seriously good.  I just scooped it up on celery sticks. Also, it was so EASY to make.  Definitely a recipe keeper.

2)  A little bragging – The playlist I made for the party was literally a masterpiece.  Every time a song came on and people said, “OMG, I love this song!” my heart went all aflutter with pride.  Obviously, I still feel pretty darn good about it today.

At least I can be proud of the musical masterpiece I created this weekend.  Time to let everything else go. . .

What helps you stay motivated?  How do you recover from major eating mishaps?



Filed under Health

9 responses to “The One Where I Feel Discouraged.

  1. Mrs. BW

    I feel your pain today. I got on the scales this morning for the first time in at least a month maybe more. I’ve gained back nearly all the weight I lost last summer! I was disheartened and started to think that I was starting over from scratch. But after a bit of reflection I know that that’s sooo not the case. I’m in the best fitness shape I’ve ever been in, so although I’m not happy with the weight or how my waist has been looking, I comfort myself by knowing that I can still run more than I ever have, and I climbed the Western hemisphere’s tallest building just three months ago, and could do it again today. I know how to loose the weight, now I just have to buckle down and do it. Egg for breakfast, intense intreval training AT LEAST three days a week, and no more late night snacking!! Today I made myself a spreadsheet (I’ll send you one, not that you need it with Weight Watchers, just so you can see what I’m working with, and what I spent at least a half hour of my morning working on!) that keeps all the information on one sheet. I used something similar last week, it just helps me stay accountable, also I like having check boxes, because it feels really good checking things off. (Sorry to be so long-winded, but I know the discouragement you’re feeling today!)

  2. quarterlifeconfused

    I completely agree about how good it feels to check things off! Please send spreadsheet my way!

    Also, you are a total stair-climbing, running bad ass and you inspire me to work harder so when you feel discouraged I hope you remember that!

  3. Mrs. BW

    Thanks, that does help to keep me motivated!! 😀

    I’m so excited you’re joining us in the BOK climb this year!!

    (Correction: “I used something similar last WEEK” should read “I used something similar last SUMMER.” Obviously I used nothing last week!)

  4. Mrs. K2

    Your playlist was fantastic! Matt kept wanting me to ask you to burn him a copy because he loved it so much!

  5. Mindy

    Maybe something was in the air last week because I stuggled too! I only did cardio one time, Sat I bought Double Stuff Oreos and consumed so many I literally got sick, and I drank more wine then water last week! So I feel your pain today! I’ve been trying to write down how I feel when I eat crap vs. how I feel when I’m eating healthy and that kind of helps me get back on track!!

  6. Okay let me share my weight-loss experience with you, because it involves both a huge amount of discouragement AND a happy ending. So a few years ago, I was about 2 pounds away from being overweight for my height. When I tell people that, even people who knew me then, they swear it couldn’t have been true because I always dressed in a way that covered it up. But it was true, and I decided to do something about it. Fitness had been a big part of my life in the past but I had let it go and let myself go, so I decided to get back on track.

    I stopped with the half-assed attempts at getting healthy and went full throttle. I started going to the gym every single day and eating diet-friendly foods. After a whole month of discipline and hard work, I couldn’t wait to get on the scale. I hadn’t noticed any difference in my body, but I figured surely the scale would give me some kind of validation. Nothing. I hadn’t lost a single pound after an entire month of doing EVERYTHING right. I was super discouraged, but I kept going. Every day I spent an hour or more at the gym, combining cardio with weight training. Every day I deprived myself of fattening foods and found a new place in my heart for the healthy stuff. Fast forward to month 2- still nothing.

    I hadn’t gained any weight, but the fact that I had been working so hard for TWO FREAKING MONTHS with no results was maddening. I screamed and cried like a toddler, but I kept going. I knew something had to give. Around the third month, the weight literally started melting off like crazy- I couldn’t keep up with it. I was losing pounds so fast that it seemed like it didn’t take much time at all after those initial setbacks to reach where I wanted to be (after those first two months of frustration, it only took another two months to drop 20 pounds). And now, I feel SO much better about myself. I’ve gotten to a place where I actually love to work out, and eating healthy is a challenge I enjoy (even though I do make room for the occasional cheat). I think my body needed to understand that I was serious this time, and it took a minute for the weight loss to start happening but it was awesome when it did. It was awesome to have to buy new clothes, to have people tell me I looked great, to get all that validation I was yearning for in the beginning.

    I totally understand the discouragement. It sucks when you feel like you’ve let yourself down. But I can tell that you’ve got some serious determination, and it WILL pay off. I really admire the courage it must take to hold yourself accountable to the entire world wide web. You are a thoroughly amazing chick and I’m rooting for you!

    • quarterlifeconfused

      Thanks Holly! And congrats on your weight loss. That is awesome! Your story is totally perfect for today because this morning at my WW meeting my leader was talking about how your body will let go of the weight when it lets go of the weight. There is no magical formula but if you do what you need to do eventually it will happen! Thanks for sharing and for the encouragement!

  7. Pingback: Weekly Weigh-In: Week 3 | Quarter Life Confused

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